The real tragedy of “First Man.”

Gosling
Cute fellow, but not worth losing a salad over.

Saw the movie First Man at a theater blessed with 4D. Much shaking. Some water sprayed on us during scenes when kids were in the pool.

(Pleased we weren’t seeing Jaws. Can imagine a dead fish being tossed our way, every so often. Or severed leg.)

The theater also had excellent food, not just the usual crap. I had a Horseradish Steak Sandwich and a Green Salad.

Luckily, I didn’t dress the salad before the 4D shaking commenced. As soon as that scene went into action, my salad flew off my tray.

Review of a review: Exodus (the movie, not the Torah)

I Shit Thee Not: Jessie from "Breaking Bad" plays Joshua. Rem

I was truly looking forward to Ridley Scott’s Exodus, starring Christian (erm) Bale as Moses. Boo-de-hoo, multiple reviews say the film is is a pile of tripe. My favorite review features the humor and pin-point derision of A.O Scott’s in The New York Times, rife with cleavers such as:

Moses discovers his Jewish roots, which means that he stops shaving, starts herding goats and, unless my ears deceive me, takes to peppering his speech with stagy old-man Yiddish inflections.

Before doing this Jewish review, A. O. Scott does his homework on Jewish culture. Or he has a lot of Jewish friends. Or lives in Manhattan. Or A.O Scott is a Jew. Who knew.

Read his review. I bet it’s better than the movie.